by Chris Butterfield
Louise was 78 and widowed when she wrote out the list of her most cherished characteristics in a mate. She wanted a nice man, someone who would drive her to places like the countryside. Seven years later, comparing them to high school kids at the ages of 85 and 95, relatives still gush over the way her second husband (pictured with her above) seemed to meet every one of the criteria on the list.
Mary Jo, slightly younger at the age of 48, had wanted to be in a partnership for several years when she wrote out her list. Strangely, the attractive man next to her on the airplane to Mexico, to whom she had been too shy to talk, sat down across from her in the restaurant where she ate later that night. Stranger still, upon initiating a conversation, she found him to be from her hometown of Seattle. Strangest of all, he met most of the criteria on her list, and they are still together, reading each other's minds as only soulmates do.
Upon first glance, Mary Jo and Louise's salvation from the myriad wastelands of Cinderella dreamers can be chalked up to a couple of those old fairytale endings reporters often use to begin their stories. But when more deeply analyzed, it can be said that what they produced in the material realm by simply jotting down a list on a sheet of paper is something that we all can accomplish. It's called "conscious creation."
By nature, finding a mate is one of the most unpredictable processes in modern civilization. No longer do your parents set you up with the woman from the tribe beside the next villages river. Today it is all too easy to become lost in the sea of life around us, too easy to be swayed into believing the beer commercial when it says, "This redhead over here is for you." In reality, there is a natural order to energy patterns in the universe. Its not ironic, then, that people in the know turn to the technique of conscious creation to surround themselves with the energy that is conducive to what they want.
Conscious creation is the deliberate envisioning of what one desires, whether in love or life, and subsequent transfer of that desire to ones feeling state. In other words, one must trick ones mind into believing that ones desires have already been granted and truly believe in their inevitable manifestation in the material dimension. As in the above examples, the remainder of the job falls into the hands of the universe.
By nature, finding a mate is one of the most
"Ive actually been using this with my work at Divine Love, and its phenomenal," said Staci Shreeve, a Seattle matchmaker who sets up and coaches her clients by using conscious creation. "I just spend time thinking people and situations are going to come to me that are spectacular, and they do. Ive been in business for four and a half months, and Im already profitable."
At its core, conscious creation is based on magnetism and energy frequencies, according to Shreeve. As Obi-Wan Kanobi explained in Star Wars, all hydrogen-based life forms are derived from the same energy, connected by it internally and externally. Its natural, then, that the surrounding universe feels the vibrations they emit. It becomes the medium through which ones energetic message passes, and, eventually, the desired audience hears the message.
"Its like two magnets attracted to each other," said Shreeve, who has helped bring together several confessed soulmates, directly and indirectly, including Mary Jo. "If were both vibrating on a similar frequency, then people are going to be automatically drawn together. Thats why I think we come up with these wonderful meetings of people just bumping into each other in these divinely inspired situations."
So why doesnt everyone just run out and materialize a dream mate, like, right now? Unfortunately, the universe has no timetable for the manifestation of these desires. Things often do not happen as planned, and a person may become prematurely frustrated or, even more likely, not have deemed himself or herself worthy of the fulfillment of their desires right from the beginning.
"If a person really does not feel that they deserve the success or the happiness of bringing a soulmate into their lives, even if they select a self-growth or self-improvement method like conscious creation theyll pretend like its happening on one level, but on another level theyre not going to believe it will ever happen," said Seattle-area goals consultant David Groninger.
For those in this state of mind, conscious creation must first become subconscious shifting before they can expect to achieve any results. Groninger listed several steps that one can take to further themselves along on the path toward dream manifestation.
Self-love is a very important component. Without self-love, people naturally tend to sabotage or undermine their goals by living a life of destructive contradictions.
"When you dont love yourself, then that desire or that energy of trying to visualize yourself being in a better space is very hard to come by because you think, Why should I be in a better space? " said Groninger. " Im an unlovable person anyway. So that energy for creation is much less present."
By consciously bringing self-love into our lives, we more readily observe our favorable characteristics, and then are able to concentrate on those characteristics and make them shine. This makes us more lovable to others including our desired lover.
"A lot of people put on acts where they arent being their authentic selves, but theyre trying to impress someone," Shreeve noted. "That doesnt work very well. The important thing is to find out what our best characteristics are and totally exude and ooze them and show up like that in the world.
"If were coming from this place of lack I just keep attracting these men that are emotionally unavailable then were going to be at a much lower level of vibration and are going to keep attracting more of who we are. Our thoughts become reality, so the secret is to focus on what we do want."
"Putting yourself into action is an important component in accomplishing any goal. Talk to others who have been there. Talk to therapists and counselors. Read. By forcing yourself to go out and take action, youre saying to yourself, What Im doing is valid, and you greatly enhance your chances for making that shift," said Groninger.
On the flip side, when youre surrounded by people who arent having success in their relationships either, and you remain inactive, it is very hard to make the shift, because no one in your environment is supporting or giving encouragement to that way of thinking.
"Theres still that proactive element there," Groninger said. "For a lazy person, or person that doesnt feel like they deserve it anyway, theyre going to sit there and nothing is going to happen. Theres a certain part of them that tells them that was the perfect response because they really didnt want anything anyway. If a person does want something, theyre going to get ideas as they visualize it that will spark them into some kind of activity."
Right about now, youre convinced that you can bend the fork, right? Youve got all this energy there, and youre ready to run out and corral the model in the beer commercial, right? Hold up just one minute. At some point, biological makeup must be considered. According to Shreeve, sometimes the exact replica of the model just isn't always available. In other words, its not all freewheeling fun and games in conscious creation. There is a law albeit flexible underlying life, and it can be felt if we are in touch with our inner beings. By being in touch with who we are in this way, the shifts we make will focus us on what we truly want and need to fulfill our desires.
When envisioning a mate, as our successful participants did above, one must first write down a list of desired characteristics.
Author Barbara DeAngelis listed six qualities that are good to look for in a mate in her relationship-centered conscious creation book, Are You the One for Me? Knowing Who's Right & Avoiding Who's Wrong. The category of good looks is noticeably absent. Her list:
1) Commitment to personal growth
2) Emotional openness
4) Maturity and responsibility
5) High self-esteem
6) Positive attitude toward life
Next, Shreeve recommended envisioning a mate by getting your feelings in line with your desires. "Come up with your own epic film or fantasy of who youd want to be with," she said. "Imagine traveling to tropical lands, sipping champagne in the south of France, how your lover looks and how it feels like to be with them. The most important thing in our attraction is our feeling state, because our feeling state is the magnet that we attract from."
Finally, the "glue" aspect of all this is consistent focus. Its important that you devote part of each day toward perpetuating that desire. Make a list (which may change) each day of what you value in yourself, a partner, and in a partnership. Create a symbol for that partnership, something akin to the "the artist formerly known as Prince" symbol, that you can jot down to remind yourself of your desires.
According to Shreeve, after about three months following an initial flat period, the graph begins to accelerate and synchronicity, or a spontaneous occurrence of events leading you in a desired direction, will begin to set in, and then, wham!
When you finally meet the person you have been in search of, something changes, which can only be described as love. The lights change. Focus on the outside world blurs. Time seems to stop. When it really happens in a divine way, Shreeve says, its two people working on a similar frequency. You can ask many people who are married how they knew that "this was the one," and they cant tell you. They just knew.
But dont take our word for it. Perhaps Louise, the authentic, real deal, captured it best when she timidly said, "Its sort of like a miracle."
Consciously co-create the vision of your soulmate with Staci Shreeve and Divine Love; call (206) 517-2956 for a free consultation or visit <www.divinelovesingles.com>. See their ad in this months issue.
David Groninger (<email@example.com>,  368-9651) says, "The neurotic builds castles in the air, the psychotic moves in, and the therapist collects the rent. A goals coach helps you build the foundation that supports your castles, visions, dreams, and goals."