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What about us? How do we handle our doubts? Our difficulties? Our worries? Our failures? It's easy to be enticed into thinking that successful people don't have any troubles, that things always work out for them. It's easy to think that if only things were different for us in some way, life would be easier and success closer to attaining. That isn't true, of course. Everyone has challenges to face in life. We all have disappointments, lesser abilities of one kind or another, some sort of lack to deal with, and as a character in a movie once said, "I guess we'd all put in for new pasts if we could." The day that we finally accept that the ride can be bumpy is the day we begin to experience freedom because that is the day we accept being where we are. We can't get to New York if we can't accept that we're starting out in San Francisco. Here are some ideas to mull over when you're faced with self-doubt, fear, or worry: 1. What I am facing now is only a chapter in the book of my life. Perhaps it is only a paragraph or sentence. It is not the entire book. Everything is temporary here and I have no reason to believe this situation is any different. 2. What do I want in my life right now? Love, ideas, time, money, health? What do I spend most of my time thinking about? These or their opposites? What we continually focus on is what we get, now or eventually. 3. Think of someone you admire, someone who is a hero to you. Imagine that person in your situation. What do you think he or she would do? Try it. 4. Is there anything you can do right this instant to solve the difficulty you're facing? If there is, do it. If there isn't, let the whole thing go and take a walk, go for a swim, or play with your hobby. 5. What can you do for someone else right now? Instead of stewing over your own problems, help another with theirs. You'll find your difficulty decreases in direct proportion to your willingness to give to others. 6. Pray. Notice I didn't say "beg in a desperate manner." In whatever form suits you, direct your intentions for a solution to Spirit, God/dess, the Universe, the Great What-Is. State your intention to resolve your difficulties in the most loving manner possible and then release the situation to the higher forces. Spend some time listening for guidance and then follow up on it. 7. Make a list of at least 25 things for which you are grateful. When trouble strikes, we tend to focus on it so much we forget about all the things that are right in our lives. Doing this on a daily basis keeps life in much better perspective. 8. Detach. You are not the situation you are facing. You are not your body. You are not your mind. All of those are things you use to live your life here. Instead of identifying with any of that, identify with your soul-self. Be the driver, not the car. 9. Keep your sense of humor. Find a way to laugh at yourself and at the situation you're facing. Even the most serious matters benefit from a good dose of humor. Read the comics. Watch a funny movie. Grab a humorous book. Laugh and lighten up. 10. Pretend you're full of confidence and that the issue you're facing has been resolved. Act as if you have the solution and that you have successfully met the challenge. There is great power in as-if-ing. You are creating a new template for your subconscious to use; make it what you want it to be rather than allowing it to continue manifesting what you don't want. 11. Take a vacation. It doesn't have to be an elaborate affair, but if at all possible remove yourself from the situation which is causing the stress. If it is a health issue that goes where you do, that is even more of a reason to take some time away to play. Getting away gives you a new perspective from which to operate. 12. Think of the last time you had a big problem and remember how you felt when it was resolved. Spend some time generating that same feeling of success now. Carry it with you into today's situation. 13. Plant a fast-growing seed. Let it represent a positive outcome to your situation. Spend time with it daily and tend it well once the plant pokes its head out of the soil. Some traditions recommend planting a tree which represents your personal and spiritual growth and using it as a symbol for your inner work. 14. When you are particularly down and have trouble getting back on track, think of the universe. Visualize the stars, planet, moon, and sun. Recognize how all of them stay on track day after day, century after century. Cannot the power which guides them take care of you? 15. Go to a natural setting. Walk barefoot in the grass or wade in the ocean, a lake, or stream. Really connect with the earth and pull her healing energy up into your body through your feet. 16. What's the worst that can happen? What will you do if that happens? Now you're prepared for the worst so go forward expecting the best! 17. If the situation is very serious or very tenacious consider going to a therapist, peer support group, or twelve-step program. Sometimes we need help to move a mountain. Have the humility and courage to recognize that and do something about it. 18. Write about the problem in your journal and do some dialogue using your non-dominant hand playing the parts of your wise one, your inner child, your injured one, etc. 19. Find a subliminal or guided meditation tape that addresses your specific problem. Use it every day for a month. 20. Light a candle and make the intention that when it has burned down, you will have solved your issue. 21. If your challenge involves another person, do what you can to mediate the situation. Be willing to be flexible and to meet them more than halfway. If both of you do that, the solution will come rapidly. If they won't work with you, continue on your own with as much integrity as your can. 22. Give up the need to be right. Many of our problems arise when we aren't willing to face our own weaknesses or lack of knowledge. As was recently printed in Reader's Digest, the good thing about being wrong is the joy it brings to others. 23. Give up. When all else fails, give it all up, quit trying to force something to happen, and trust in the higher wisdom of the universe to handle things for you. Sometimes the only real problem we have is our inability to trust. 24. Clean house. Clean out your closets. Give away things you no longer need or use. By getting rid of the old, you'll be making way for new ways of thinking, feeling, and being. 25. Think, speak, and act affirmatively. It doesn't cost any more to be upbeat than it does to be negative. Even if someone calls you Pollyanna, so what if it works? Don't deny the reality of your situation, but you can see it, talk about it, and act about it in the most positive way possible. Remember, we're all the same when it comes to having to deal with negatives, failure, and troubles. Where we differ is in how we approach what life has put on our plates. We get to choose whether we are going to be masters of our own destiny or if we are going to be whiners and victims. Make your choice one you can live with. |
Have
you ever felt tentative about your life, wondering if you're
going to be able to meet expectations, deadlines, terms, or agreements?
We all have. The difference between those who accomplish and
those who don't is that those who do are somehow able to let
go of their self-doubt and believe in something greater than
themselves.The accomplishers are able to rise above circumstances
and conditions and view their experience from a position of ability
and confidence, even while remaining completely aware of the
physical reality in which they find themselves. These people
are able to recognize that the solution to their difficulty is
not to be found through worry, doubt, or fear. They know that
staying stuck in the little picture isn't going to assist them
in rising above it to the greatness of which they are capable.