Personal Reflections and Guidance
Like many people who invested much of my time and finances in going to college, I found out that I had never really taken time to truly research, let alone experience, the careers for which my degree was training me. There were and are career services on most, if not all, college campuses. As an undergraduate, however, I never knew this. Not until I went back to graduate school did I explore such services, actually interning at the career center in my school. Although the experience of graduate school can prepare you for your career, you still may find, as I did, that only experience and time in the field will begin to make you into a true "professional." In my case, I had felt in going through my graduate program that there were many parts of the counseling session that were not being addressed. I got a feeling then that it was what you didn’t see or hear from clients that would end up telling you the most about them. I later learned that this is what is called subtle energy or chi. After graduation, however, I realized that most employers did not believe in paying attention to clients’ chi. I worked first as a counselor in a domestic violence shelter, then at a center that sought employment for the mentally disabled, and next in three different career counseling centers, one in academia, one a nonprofit, and the third in a huge corporation. As I counseled clients in each case, I began to realize the truth of what I had thought in school. I couldn’t ignore the fact that there was much more going on in the session than the dialogue we were exchanging. I began to "sense" problems lurking behind polite smiles. Sometimes I even saw what I later learned were energy fields, fluctuating in color depending on the client’s mood. I asked my colleagues if they experienced such phenomena. Most thought I was working too many hours and needed better boundaries. Like others who feel constrained by their job titles, I was determined to learn more about what I was experiencing, even if it meant going beyond the realm of my profession. I began studying practices such as Polarity Therapy, Reiki, and Therapeutic Touch to explore the other levels of reality I kept encountering in my sessions. As I studied these therapies, I began to realize that although I was helping people as a counselor, I wasn’t truly able to offer them all the alternatives I felt would have made their session more therapeutic. With little support from employers or colleagues, I didn’t see how I could combine my new knowledge with the traditional counseling I was doing. Did I even want to continue doing that? In career counseling, we often administer personality and interest inventory tests to determine people’s strengths and abilities. When I would take them myself, I always came up scoring high for counseling and educator. That made sense. As a counselor, I was always educating my clients on techniques they could use to enhance their résumés, or to successfully go on an interview, etc. I had the information I needed about myself, but no concrete plan of how to implement it. It seemed that I was doing what I was born to do. For months I questioned what I should do. Should I leave the profession for which I was trained? It seemed as if I had barely gotten started. After several years and seeing hundreds of clients, many of whom seemed to be finding their own way toward manifesting the kind of life they wanted, I sank into a bit of a depression. When I tried to rationalize what was occurring, I thought maybe it was the job setting that prevented me from staying with any organization beyond one year. Gradually, I realized that it had more to do with the kind of work I was doing than the environment in which I found myself. One day, practicing techniques I had learned from a self-help workshop, I surrendered to my higher power and, amazingly, the answer to what I needed to do just clicked. A colleague said to me, "Why don’t you take some time off and spend some time with yourself? It will do you good." Somehow, I got the courage up to ask my employers and, just as I had seen so many of my clients do, I took the risk of a sabbatical to reevaluate where I was going. This step proved to be invaluable. I took two months off and went on a women’s retreat, coming back with a renewed sense of myself. I signed up for an Artist’s Way group and gradually opened up to my creativity after years of watching others express theirs. I wrote in my journal daily. I attended support groups to help me clarify where I had been and what I wanted to envision in my future. I recorded my dreams, and during the sabbatical I painted anything I could get my hands on. I was becoming surrounded by my true self. I let my imagination run loose and began to brainstorm. The more I was in touch with my true self, the more I realized that it would almost be impossible for me to return full time to a job description thought up by other individuals. That was over a year ago. After taking that initial risk of leaving my full-time job, I have come full circle in creating my own practice. Perhaps you resonate with this story. You have some idea of what you want to do but no clear vision of what you see yourself doing. The first place to start may be taking some time off and not filling it up with chores and errands. Go out to a park or on a structured retreat. During this time, having a coach, counselor, or a mentor can aid in assisting you along the path. Many clients have asked me why talking to their relatives or colleagues about their issues doesn’t work as well as talking with a counselor. Often, although family members and friends can mean well in offering their advice, they have also gotten used to you being stuck in your situation, and might be afraid of what your changes would mean to them and will suggest less risky alternatives "for you." Making any kind of change involves taking a risk, and for some people, this might mean that when they leave their job they also need to leave their relationship, because both were defined by the job in the first place. The structure and objectivity gleaned from professional assistance can be invaluable in the career-changing process. I have also found the following books to be of great value in helping you start looking at what dreams you have (or once had) for a future/life you want to create: What Color is My Parachute by Richard Nelson Bolles The Road Less Traveled by M. Scott Peck Wishcraft by Barbara Sher Creating the Work You Love by Rick Jarow If you require more training to enter the profession of your choice, your career counselor can offer local resources for education (including the abundance of distance learning opportunities now available at many colleges). Perhaps you wish to begin your own business. The Small Business Association (SBA) and Women’s SBA both offer low-cost classes and provide mentors to help guide you along in the creation of your business. Having a support group to encourage you in a career transition is important as you develop your business. The Women’s Business Network is also a wonderful resource for meetings, support groups, and other professionals that can help you build your dream. Finally, some individuals find going through such changes quite stressful. Receiving bodywork, such as massage or Reiki, can help aid in releasing blocks that prevent you from creating the life you want to lead. Practices such as yoga, meditation, or the martial arts can also help alleviate stress and give you focus and concentration for your next direction. Eileen Wurst, M.A., is a Reiki master/practitioner through the Seattle Holistic Center and the WomanSpirit Center in Issaquah. She will be leading a Monday night series entitled "Obtaining Clarity for Your Career" at the Depression Wellness Network in Seattle on September 17 and 24 from 7:00-9:00 p.m. ($35 for the series). Call (206) 523-8999, e-mail <Hicrystalsky@aol.com>, or visit <http://www.crystalskystudios.com/>. |
What do you do when going to work no longer has any meaning for you, when you realize that you are not living your life’s purpose? As a woman who has worked for the last ten years as a crisis and career counselor, as well as having gone through my own career change, I feel qualified and experienced enough to give some suggestions that can make this period of transition much easier and more insightful for you.